To Life . . . with gratitude and happiness

I’ve just completed my 3 months transplant journey with all kinds of good news from my doctors. The most critical period after transplant is behind me and I only have to go to Stanford once a month for the next nine months.

Pete and I made our longest driving trip since my surgery – we went to Las Vegas for a few days. Now that I know I can sit for so many hours we’re hoping for a plane trip next.

Joan just returned from her trip to Vancouver Island to see her friend from high school and her three god children.

I am so grateful to all my doctors, nurses, and the entire kidney transplant team at Stanford for their wonderful care. I am also grateful to the local doctors, nurses, and the SLO Dialysis Center team for keeping me in good health in order to have a successful transplant and recovery. To all my family members, friends, business associates, and some people I have never met who have sustained me with prayers, cards, email, flowers, and all types of positive support I am forever grateful. Without Joan who showed me her greatest love by giving me one of her kidneys, I would not have been able to make this wonderful journey. I can once again live an active normal life and I feel blessed.

The best way for me to sum up my last three months is to express how happy I am and what happiness has been for me.

Happiness is…

• Feeling better and stronger each day after my transplant
• Supported and surrounded by wonderful, positive family, friends, and medical team
• Spending quality time with our grand daughter Jade and watching her grow (I love her smiles.)
• Blessed with two loving daughters who have been there for us throughout my recovery and all the time (We’re so fortunate to have them live close by.)
• To have the wonderful team of doctors, nurses, and staff at Stanford who have helped me from three years ago until now and many more years to come (What a dedicated group of people.)
• For the wonderful service at the Marriott Residence Inn at Los Altos (We highly recommend them.)
• To have Pete by my side 24/7 these past months from before surgery until now (bringing me food, literally carrying everything when I couldn't, taking walks with me, and staying positive throughout my ups and downs during recovery, and taking me to all my hospital appointments, and driving me to see places in our motor home.

• My office associates and Joy stepping up and “holding down the fort” in my absence, dealing with all the challenges of the business.
• My sister and cousin who stayed at our house and took over the care of our mom in the nursing home.
• Last but not least, for Joan being my donor and suffered for a month after her surgery in order to give me a functioning kidney and a new life, I’m forever grateful!

My list can go on and on, but just a glimpse of why I’ve been happy and positive throughout this journey. Happiness, according to some studies, may help us live longer and healthier and has a positive effect on our immune system. The World Health Organization considers depression the leading cause of disability for women of all ages and projects that by 2020 it will rank as the number two cause of global disability after heart disease. So, in a nutshell, “Don’t worry, be happy!”

Here are some tips for being positive and happy:
• Exercise or stay active
• Listen to your body and eat a healthy diet
• Be grateful for what you have, who you are and the people you enjoy
• Reach out and touch some one in a positive way no matter how small
• Work hard, play hard

Happiness is also getting back into my regular clothes again. My weight had fluctuated 30 pounds in the last three years due to diets and dialysis from my renal failure and I’ve gone through three wardrobes. What a wonderful feeling to be “normal” again.

I was listening to Barbara Streisand’s song “Here’s to Life.” This is what she said about her song:

“Here’s to life …

speaks to the idea that
no matter what you’ve
experienced in life, joy as
well as pain, it’s all a gift.
Being alive and still
wanting more…more love,
compassion, understanding,
giving…more experiences.
I think of all the roads
yet to be traveled … ‘I still
believe in chasing dreams
and placing bets.’”

I share her philosophy about life, and you might too. So . . . Here’s to life to all of you and me!

Addie

No news is good news (from Joan)

Hello everyone!

My mom has been bugging me about posting something on our blog. She says it's been a long time since I updated everyone on how I was doing. Well, I'm glad to say that I'm doing very well. We both had a check-up at Stanford last Monday and passed with flying colors. My mom has another appointment in two weeks and then we both don't go back until January! I think she is busy planning a long-awaited trip during that time that she's free from appointments.

I'm pretty much back to life-as-usual. Still working back into the stamina of my gym workouts, but day-to-day life is back on track. The only kidney-related bad news is that my 17 year old cat, Bart, died last month of kidney failure. He was a great cat and a wonderful companion and is very greatly missed. (Apparently, according to my vet, they actually do feline kidney transplants, but I think that was a bit extreme for such an old cat!)

I'm making my first post-transplant trip this month. I'll be visiting my friend Holley and her family on Vancouver Island in Canada. I'm looking forward to some chilly fall weather!

Happy fall to everyone! Hope you are all enjoying this season of abundance and thankfulness.

God Bless!

Joan

A Week of Celebrations

Pete is back from a trip to Colorado Springs to celebrate his sister's 60th birthday. The rest of us stayed home to celebrate my mother's 89th birthday. I'm celebrating my going back to work a few hours a day and getting back to the "swing of things." It's good to see everyone.

It was nice to have a two-month vacation even under the circumstance. Pete and I have never spent so much time together day in and out. It's good to know that we enjoy each other's company even under the situation - "in sickness or in health." Guess we will survive our retirement years when I decide to "hang up my hat."

I mentioned in my last blog that I was catching up on paying bills. I am thankful that most of those bills had nothing to do with my medical expenses. Thank goodness for our good health insurance. Based on my personal experience starting over three years ago when I was diagnosed with renal failure, my medical bills had increased drastically. I would have had to pay about $500/day for over a year for my home dialysis supplies and equipment if I didn't have good insurance coverage. Some of my meds cost up to $600 per month but because of my co-pay through my insurance I was able to take them as prescribed, sometimes having to change meds due to side effects. One of the anti-viral pills I am taking (thank goodness I won't need it after October 15!) would have cost me $60 a pill without insurance. How can we afford such high medical expenses and prescription drug costs if it hadn't been for the health insurance we have? I haven't seen the bills from Stanford Hospital and can't imagine the figures on those bills. All I've heard is if it hasn't been for my insurance coverage my immuno-supressant meds which most likely I will have to take for life could run into thousands of dollars per year. The question remains "how much health care reform do we need in this country?" I can only speak for myself as to where I'd be if it hadn't been for my insurance coverage. So far, I have the peace of mind knowing that as long as I pay my premium, the insurance company can not cancel me. One never knows when your health can take a turn in your life. If and when it happens, it affects you and your family emotionally, physically and financially. I've been fortunate that I have a wonderful family and many friends who have been there for me and continue to do so. We have been blessed with very few illnesses in our family and never had to face what some people go through in their lives. I have greater compassion for those who try to overcome their health issues, some long term, some terminal, some with pain and suffering, some with complications from meds, some with major depression, etc. etc. As much as I have great support and could continue to work, the last three years were a challenge in different ways. I've learned to become a more positive, compassionate, tolerant, disciplined, and hopefully patient person. I've grown in ways I never knew I could. I've learned to appreciate people and things I sometimes took for granted. I've learned to look at the bigger picture in life and value the special moments of each day.

Joan and I will have our last follow-up appointments at Stanford Hospital next week. We both hope to get "flying colors" reports from our doctors. Joan has been working full time for the last month taking care of the office. Not only did she give me her kidney, she came home to take care of many things for my business and at home while I was in Palo Alto. How lucky I am!

I'm glad Joan and Joy live so close by and we get to see little Jade several times a week. With the Cal Poly students back on campus this week, Joy is keeping busy at work. SLO is "alive" again.

So life goes on and my 3rd phase of recovery will soon be behind me. Pete has helped me so much with his 24/7 care-giving, driving, cooking, and his amazing patience during my recovery. Yes, I am blessed and that calls for the biggest celebration!

What are you celebrating this week?

Addie

My Bosom Buddy

We've just returned from Stanford (3 appointments in two hours, including the removal of the stent from my ureter which was placed during the transplant). We managed to get some walking in by visiting IKEA and even had open-faced sandwich and Swedish meatballs for lunch there.

I'm glad to be home again and will be going in to my office for the first time in two months starting with a few hours each day and eventually full time by October.

On Friday after work Joan had the office associates over in her home for a TGIF. Pete made pizza and baked cookies and Joan gave a nice buffet as usual. It was good to see everyone and to do a little catching up and visiting. That's when I decided I'm ready to go back and face my work.

I was pleasantly surprised by a visit from my cousin from Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, whom I haven't seen for over 40 years and his son from Sydney, Australia whom I've never met. My brother Baru drove them and they stayed with us for two days (our first house guests since our coming home). We enjoyed their visit and hope to visit them when we're ready to travel again.

I've had a bosom buddy for the last two months since I was discharged from the hospital. Like the heart patients who get a red heart-shaped pillow, I received a baby blue one instead. My initial reaction was what would I do with it? Little did I know that this pillow would become my bosom buddy and I've carried it day and night from the car to the couch and to my bed. It serves as a cushion between the seat belt and my abdominal area when traveling in the car or motor home. I use it to rest my arms and as a prop wherever needed. It's like having a teddy bear all over again. It's amazing how something so insignificant has become my constant companion all these weeks.

Pete and I have enjoyed cooking at home and going on walks a couple times a day. I am allowed to carry over 10 lbs. now so I can pick up and hold little Jade again. It's also nice to be able to drive. It's great just to feel good and not have to do my dialysis every day and nine hours every night. Just imagine how much more time I have now to just do as I wish.

I'm slowly getting around to "thank you" notes, returning phone calls, paying bills, and seeing a few people as opportunity presents itself. I hope to catch up with more of you as time dictates. It's still wonderful to hear from those of you who have kept in touch. Your thoughts and friendship are always appreciated.

Stay healthy and live each day to the fullest!

Until my next blog,

Addie

Home Sweet Home

There's no place like home. We came home on Tuesday and have been busy unpacking and getting back to the routines of "normal living." It was nice to come home to a clean house (thanks to my friend and faithful cleaning lady, Frauke, who also did double duty in our absence visiting Mom at the nursing home every day). Everyone did a fabulous job keeping the house, plants, and garden in good shape. We've been harvesting our vegetables, and have been enjoying our organic produce. I felt so much better the very day I came home - all my pain is gone and its nice to be able to bend down, take two walks a day, cook, sleep on my sides instead of just on my back, and finally drove myself to get a hair cut.

It was so exciting to see little Jade and she was so happy to see us. What a precious moment when she reached out her arms to me and wouldn't stop hugging me, putting her head on my shoulder and looking at my face now and then to make sure I'm really here. What pure joy! She was happy just to sit next to Grandma and to find all her toys and books she hasn't seen for a while. That smile of hers always warms our hearts.

With the exception of the meds schedule (my meds have been lessened to 2/3 of what they were) and having to rest now and then throughout the day I feel like I might be able to work at the office on a limited basis soon. We'll see! I do have two more triips to Stanford this month for follow-ups.

We've been enjoying the garden, home cooking and even got to see "The Producers" yesterday at Clark Center. Frauke made a ratatouille from our eggplants from the garden plus a fresh peach pie and came by Friday evening to have pizza that Pete made. Life is pretty good as long as we don't have any more heat waves. Pete is out on his bike, enjoying his gardening, has done some planting, and will resume at the gym and volunteering at the botanical garden.

The Central Coast is definitely the best place to live. We enjoyed the Los Altos/ Palo Alto area but as soon as we saw the Pacific Ocean and no traffic we know we've come back to "Paradise."

It's the little things in life that sometimes make such a difference. I'm counting my blessings and grateful to be back to home, sweet home.

Cheers!

Addie

We had been looking forward to meeting Joan, Joy, and Jade in Monterey last Sunday, but little Jade came down with hand, foot and mouth illness which she picked up at the day care center. This is a viral infection mainly affecting children under 10 but very contagious. Pete and I ended up visiting the Hakone Gardens and estate in Saratoga, originally built in 1915 by San Francisco philanthropists Oliver and Isabel Stine as a mountainside family retreat on 18 acres. In 1966, the city of Saratoga purchased Hakone and it's currently operated by the Hakone Foundation. Hakone is the oldest Japanese estate garden and Asian Retreat Center in the Western Hemisphere. This hill and pond style garden emphasizes the harmonious placement of plants, stones, and water, with steps and terraces ending with a moon viewing house on top overlooking the garden and koi pond in the middle. Hakone was one of the major film sites for the movie "Memoirs of a Geisha." We ended our visit with a picnic on the lower terrace. Such a serene and tranquil way to spend part of our Sunday.

We had an enjoyable visit to the California Academy of Sciences in Golden Gate Park, San Francisco on Tuesday. It was impressive and state of the art, and beautiful. All the exhibits and shows were featured in such a way you can take your time and enjoy them leisurely. We especially enjoyed the planetarium show and going up to the the living roof where the entire roof tops are covered with plants and solar panels, not mentioning the view. Needless to say, Pete had to wheelchair me around most of the time. What an experience!

My sister, cousin, and brother and his family came to visit us on Wednesday on their way to San Fransisco. My niece took all of us old folks to a Chinese dinner and treated us to Peking duck, crispy crabs, whole fish in sweet and sour sauce, etc. We then walked over to the used books store and we all ended up with all kinds of books. My sister-in-law, Doreen, got the best deal - 10 books for $5. Then my cousin Sophia treated us to Cold Stone ice cream on our walk home. My sister bought us all kinds of vegetables from our home garden - tomatoes, corn, green beans, and strawberries. It was a fun time for all!

Thursday, Pete and I took the motor home to Thousand Trails at Yosemite Lake and planned to spend some time at Yosemite area for a couple of days. It was perfect the day we arrived - excellent weather, beautiful campground with all the conveniences, and a stream running on one side of the campground. Unfortunately, there was a fire that was actually a controlled burn that got out of hand and we woke up the next morning to ashes and smoke and they closed down most of Yosemite, so we ended up driving back down to the Thousand Trails campground in Morgan Hill for the weekend. Pete and I managed to dance a few slow and slow-paced swing steps to the music entertainment at the campground on Saturday night.

Today is Sunday. Joan is arriving in San Jose by Greyhound bus this afternoon. She will drive my car home tomorrow since I can't drive yet. I will see my doctor on Monday, my last weekly visit, and hope to head for home on Tuesday. I've had a low grade fever up to 100.5 temperature for three days and nights off and on, along with fatigue and achiness, but now, I'm feeling pretty good again.

We're looking forward to going home even though we have enjoyed ourselves in spite of the ups and downs of post op.

As we wind down phase two of my recovery and prepare for the 3rd phase, we hope to continue our conversations with you through the blog and email. I'm trying to minimize my activities since I'm still in my critical stage of my recovery. I hope to go back to work by the middle of October. Meanwhile, I will continue my visits to Stanford at least two times during my 3rd month. I'm sure Pete and I will be having some catching up to do upon our return to Morro Bay and will ease back into the routines of normal living. We can't wait to see little Jade!

Muchas Gracias for all your support and prayers. We hope all of you have had a wonderful and enjoyable summer. Live well physically, emotionally and spiritually! Be good to yourself and take care!

Adios and sayonara!

Love, Addie

8/22/09 A Wonderful Week

It has been an interesting week and everything is looking better each day now that my pain has subsided to a 2-3 on a scale of 10.

We had a leisurely Sunday morning at Elizabeth Gamble gardens on 2.5 acres – very accessible for me. We then visited the Artist Guild Village run by Stanford Packard Children’s Hospital and had a simple lunch there.

Monday is now clinic day and catch up day for us (laundry, grocery shopping, etc.).

Tuesday and Wednesday we decided to try camping in our motor home at our Thousand Trails Morgan Hill campground, only one hour from here. We were surprised how quiet and relaxing it was. It was wonderful to be outdoors just enjoying the nice weather and nature. We took a few walks, read, Pete biked and swam, cooked and BBQed. It’s nice to have a king size bed in the motor home so we slept very well after all that fresh air.

It was nice to come back to the Marriott, our home away from home and dinner was served by the inn. We’ve gotten to know the staff, the general manager and the owner of this inn. The maid brought me a bouquet of flowers from her garden, the boss asked if I needed cranberry juice or anything special his staff can do for us. We’re getting spoiled and pampered.

Today, George Janeway, our good friend and dentist came to ride his bike with Pete. They rode to Stanford from here and he also treated us to Thai food for lunch. We’re so blessed with good friends and so thankful that we always find people we enjoy getting to know, especially the couple from Green Lake, Wisconsin who have been here the whole time we are here (The husband came for radiation treatment for some rare and unusual lymphoma.) They’re glad they can go home tomorrow. We’re hoping that we can go home in about two weeks if all goes well.

One of the activities we’ve enjoyed when we need a quiet activity is watching some old movies through our Netflix subscription. This week we saw “Bridges of Madison County” and “Steel Magnolias.” I remember seeing “Steel Magnolias” when it first came out in 1989 – other than the sad ending, I didn’t relate to it at the same level as I did this time. What I’ve personally experienced recently with my transplant and at this stage in our lives now that we have a granddaughter really put a different meaning to this movie.

Thanks again for the emails and cards that continue to arrive. We really enjoy hearing from all of you. Don’t forget to stop and “smell the roses" while you’re enjoying your summer. We’re going to miss this wonderful weather when we leave this area. We’re taking full advantage of what we find here that’s different from home. Now I realize how much Pete and I missed in the past three years since we had cut down on our travels. I can’t wait until we can resume our travelling again.

We will remain in touch until we get home or whenever we see you again. God speed! Addie

The Worst is Over

8/15/09 -

The worst is over and I am ready to face the 2^nd phase (2^nd month) of recovery. Pete and I celebrated yesterday by going out in our motor home and spent all day at the Filoli gardens and estate in Woodside (where the TV series “Dynasty” was filmed). It’s only 10 miles north of Los Altos and we recommend it to those who enjoy visiting botanical gardens. The mansion of 40+ rooms sits on 650 acres. The surroundings, the sunken garden, the rose garden, etc. are so beautiful, relaxing, and inspiring. We had lunch at the café – no matter where you sit you look out to the gardens and trees. There were a lot of volunteers who are there to help and answer all kinds of questions. I had my Mom’s wheelchair, so Pete wheeled me around part of the time. After lunch, I took a rest in the motor home while Pete went back to take pictures and walk the trail. What an enjoyable day!

Since my last blog, I had a slight set-back but am now back on track. First, I discovered I was taking lot less than the dose of the prednisone, a steroid hormone to prevent rejection by lowering the inflammatory response of the body. This was going on for more than two weeks since I was discharged from the hospital. I’m now on the correct dose. Sunday night, I had fever of over 100^o F and had flu-like symptoms (achiness throughout). My patient manual said these are some of the symptoms of rejection. Thank goodness I had an appointment with my doctors Monday morning. They immediately said I had an infection on my exit site where my dialysis catheter was placed through a hole in my abdominal area. During transplant, the surgeon had removed the dialysis catheter and closed up my exit site. It turned out that my scab came off too soon and I ended up with pus beneath the surface. The doctor had to squeeze out all that pus (no fun but better than cutting it open to remove the pus). Now, I’m on an antibiotic for a week. All in all, I survived the setbacks and feel a lot better.

Harry and Arline Fierstine from San Luis Obispo came up to have lunch with us on Wednesday. We had a nice visit and it’s good to see some familiar faces. I have received more cards and emails from many of you and they continue to give encouragement and support and cheer us up each day. We even received words of kindness and prayers from people we have never met, but those who have followed the blog. Our world is full of good, positive people even though there is so much negative energy around us.

Pete and I are starting to like this Los Altos community and its surroundings – the temperature is in the 70’s and 80’s every day, sunshine, and wonderful restaurants with reasonable prices. Within a few blocks, we have Whole Foods Market and Trader Joe’s plus all the international cuisine you might want to try. We also discovered the 150 shops downtown, but we only walked a few blocks.

Life without stress is the way to live. Since we haven’t had to deal with work, house chores, paying bills, constant phone calls, entertaining, etc., we’re adjusting to a routine of one-day-at-a-time. Other than hospital appointments, we have no obligations whatsoever. That’s what I need to have a speedy recovery, so thanks to all of you back home who are doing all that and more and taking all the stress from me. I owe you BIG TIME!

We will continue to use the Marriott Residence Inn as our home base, but we hope to take a couple nights here and there in our motor home to get away a little bit. It’s amazing how simple our lives have been and yet how happy and content we are – “less is more”.

Simplify and have less stress. Enjoy life each day!

Aloha, Addie

From Addie

Joan has been home for one week and we’re both counting the days to August 14^th which will be the magical time period for us to say “the worst is behind us,” so we’re told. Joan has been going into the office a couple hours a day, but is still recovering and requiring healing time. The healing process takes up a lot of energy and drains you very quickly. Everything you do is an effort and in slow motion. Before we know it we will be just as good as new, I’m sure. My doctor told me I’ll be “better than new.” Can’t wait!

This last week has been exhausting including two days in the hospital for the IVIG.I was there from 10am to 6pm. The other two days were blood tests and clinic days. I was so glad when Friday was here so Pete and I took off in our motor home for a long ride. We met our friends David and Julee Krause from Cambria for a brief visit while we were in Scotts Valley. We then drove to Capitola and then headed up Hwy 1 to Half Moon Bay. We made several stops and enjoyed our picnic lunch in our motor home and a rest stop at Greyhound State Beach. Pete took a little hike down to the beach and scouted around and I had a nice nap in the motor home. We walked briefly around the marina at Half Moon Bay and then drove home.

Today, we decided to spend a day at our Thousand Trails campground in Morgan Hill where we used to bring the girls and their friends camping when they were little and into their teens. We stopped by Camping World on the way to pick up a few things for the motor home. It was perfect weather and we had a very relaxing day. Pete decided to cook lunch and I enjoyed eating outside under the shade of all the trees.

Tomorrow, we might go north to find a bike trail for Pete while I rest and read in the motor home. We’re so glad we brought the motor home with us. We wouldn’t have been able to get out for these little trips here and there without it. We’re getting to know this area and are enjoying the change in pace in spite of the circumstances.

Next week, hopefully, will be the last week of my twice-a-week visits to the hospital. I look forward to some good news when all my test results come back. We have made the most of our stay here. We enjoy hearing from all of you through the email, blog, cards, flowers, and the short visits of a few friends and relatives who stopped by. We really feel everyone’s love and best wishes. For those who have helped at home, especially my sister Maylin from Maui and our cousin Sophia from Singapore, my associates who keep the office running, and those who visited Mom at the nursing home I say “ A BIG THANK YOU!” We’re still not sure where we’ll be after next week, but will keep you posted.

I miss my granddaughter Jade and look forward to being able to pick her up and hold her in my arms. I can’t wait until the doctor tells me I can lift over 10 lbs again. So far, I haven’t been able to drive and thank goodness Pete doesn’t mind doing all the driving and taking me back and forth to the hospital. How we take so much for granted when we’re well. Life is precious – live each day to the fullest and count your blessings.

Until the next blog, take care and enjoy your summer!

Addie

Home Sweet Home (from Joan)

Hello friends and family! I just returned home to Morro Bay this evening and am enjoying a bit of peace and quiet with my cat Bart. There hasn't been a whole lot of action since my mom added to the blog on Tuesday. She had another appointment at Stanford on Thursday and the doctors told her that she's free to go out and about as long as she feels up to it. She's still dealing with pain from the surgery, but she's in great spirits and ready to explore the area a bit. We took a day trip out to Half Moon Bay (I think we headed out within minutes of her returning with the good news from her doctors. She was ready to hit the road!) It was a mellow trip: just a drive and lunch at a nice restaurant by the water. My friend Julianna was with us. She came up on Wednesday to help me out and keep me company. Everyone should have a professional physical therapist taking care of them!

Julianna drove me home today and helped me get unpacked. Joy had the house all stocked with food and fresh flowers. How spoiled I am and how very blessed! I will continue to take it easy and ease my way back into "normal" life over the next couple weeks. I'm not driving yet, but that's OK because I don't have anywhere I need to be in the near future!

My parents are still enjoying their "home" in Palo Alto. Dad spends a lot of time walking, using the computer, swimming in the pool, shopping and doing laundry. I suspect he'll go out for his weekly bike ride on Sunday morning again. He continues to discover all kinds of new things in the area. Mom is doing a lot of reading, listening to music, and watching TV and movies. She gets out to walk a bit each day and is now going out with my dad in the car to run errands and explore. We had a nice dinner out at the Cheesecake Factory last night to celebrate my last night there.

That's all for now. I didn't get a nap today, so am off to bed early. Blessings and love to you all!

Joan

From Addie

It has been exactly two weeks since Joan and I had our surgeries. We've had our ups and downs, but we are making progress, slowly but surely. What a gift of life Joan has given me and what an act of great love. Who would have guessed that when I brought Joan into this world that she would give me a new life. She claims she has no regrets even going through what she had to experience these last two weeks.

Pain is definitely the main challenge for both of us. Our doctors announced yesterday that we have to stop our pain pills and limit ourselves to Tylenol every six hours. We're trying our best.

Pete has been most patient doing everything for us. So far he's holding up and trying to enjoy the pool and his bike ride and daily walk to keep from burning out. He takes very good care of us.

Joy and Jade were here the first week while we were in the hospital. They were wonderful with their moral support and keeping Pete from stressing out. Joy is also helping the office with bills and ads and wherever she can help during our absence. She's working triple time: Cal Poly, my office and the baby. What a champ!

We've also been blessed with friends and relatives who have brought food & cooked, especially the first week giving support and running errands. We have felt the power of all your prayers and positive energy which really sustained us. I can truly say I was very much at peace the day of surgery and had no anxiety nor fear. The first night after surgery was a blur, but I was so lucky to have my wonderful nurse Amber who was by my side all night. I could hear her voice talking to me, but I couldn't wake up to meet her. It wasn't until the next morning that I asked her for her name when I finally opened my eyes. I thanked her profusely for her excellent care. I was very fortunate to have a private VIP room the first four days in the hospital. The team of doctors and residents and fellows came to see me every day while I was in the hospital. We all had one nurse for every 2-3 patients, so we got excellent care.

I was told during our training that my first month will be eating, sleeping and taking meds. I'm now a pro at administering my own meds from 8 a.m. to 10 p.m., adjusting on the immunosuppressant drugs as they get the results from my blood test twice a week. Joan has been cleared from her follow-up and will return for her two-month check-up. I still go to clinic twice a week and hopefully by next month only once a week. Next week I have two more IVIG infusions which will take two full days. Hopefully the nurse will come to my hotel to do my IVIG. (This is to keep me from rejecting Joan's kidney since we are not a perfect match.)

It has been a long journey since I was diagnosed with renal failure over three years ago. I have learned a lot about diets, discipline, how to adapt to a different lifestyle, staying positive, and how to do home dialysis. I have met a lot of wonderful people who have taught me knowledge I wouldn't have had and who have become my friends and support system. Having experienced and learned so much these past years, I can't help but marvel at the medical knowledge that we have and all the dedicated people who research and practice in order to enable me to take this journey. None of this could have happened if this were twenty years ago. We do have lots to be thankful for!

My heartfelt thanks to all of you who have supported us throughout this journey. We treasure and appreciate your friendship, concerns, prayers, etc. I will close with my favorite prayer:

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

Courage to change the things I can,

and wisdom to know the difference.

Addie

TGIF

Hello friends and family! Joan here.

It's Friday afternoon and I finally feel like sitting in front of the computer for a while again and updating our blog. It's amazing how draining this little machine can be when you're not feeling well. I'm glad my dad posted our update earlier in the week, but I thought I should let people know that I am feeling much better than I did on Tuesday! That was another low point, but the days have gotten better for me since then. Today I sat outside and read a magazine for a while, then chatted with my friend Kata before she headed back down south, then took a nap and now have just taken a nice shower. That's all the adventure for the day.

My mom is doing quite well according to the doctors we saw yesterday during our check-up. She's been in quite a bit of pain the last couple days, but they say that is normal and she should be feeling better within the next week. Even in her pain, she's a pleasure to be around and has been in a pretty good mood and remaining as optimistic as ever. We were cracking each other up as we hobbled into the hospital together yesterday. It was pretty pathetic looking! My mom starting laughing first and then we were both trying not to laugh because it hurt too much!

Neither of us have felt very photogenic lately, so I thought I'd post a couple pre-transplant pictures that we took up here.

Here are a couple from our first day at our hotel.

Grandpa is reading to Jade in our room. Jade took her first dip in the pool!

We arrive at Stanford Hospital on Tuesday.

Our support team.....

The patients.....

I think we're going to enjoy some Chinese take-out for dinner tonight. There are a lot of Asian restaurants in our neighborhood here. Mom and Dad both send their love to all. Thanks to everyone once again for your prayers and good wishes.

Tuesday -- It's my turn now -- Pete

Hi everyone -- Joy has left and Joan is not up to writing today. Addie has also been keeping a low profile on the couch. We spent part of the morning getting better acquainted with her bucket of meds; some to be taken at 8am, some at 10am, a few with lunch, a few more at 6pm, and finally, the last at 10pm. I have my cell-phone set to remind me. When it went off at 2:30, I was reminded to go to the the gym, but that's back in Morro Bay. Not today. I did go for a walk to check out the Whole Food market. It's like a giant New Frontiers market! I'm looking forward to a return trip! Luckily, Joan's friend, Kata is here to help! I went in to check on Joan this morning. She wanted me to give her the injection she has been looking forward to every morning. Just as I had rubbed down her arm with the alcohol swab, she felt queezy and laid back down on the couch. Kata was chopping ingredients for her "healing soup". I left the room for a few moments to check on Addie. When I came back, I knocked on the door. I heard Kata say she'd be there in a minute. When she finally came to the door, she had a pan in her hand with what I thought was ingredients for the soup she was preparing. Well, not so. Joan had just lost it and the pan was what Kata had found just in time! We had a good laugh. Even Joan was laughing! Addie and I had some of Kata's soup for lunch. The lentils, carrots, celery, chicken broth, and seasoning were very satisfying. Joan stuck to her chicken noodle soup and crackers. There's plenty more if Joan is ready for some tomorrow. Both Joan and Addie have been sleeping most of the day. I did take Addie out of the room for two walks up and down the hallway. Joan has been up to walk around in her room a few times. All in all, both are doing well, considering they have just been "home" a few days.

Before I sign-off, I do want to take this opportunity to thank all of you who have helped out in so many ways! We have all felt surrounded by your support and love! Addie and Joan are doing well and I'm sure it won't be long before we can all be home in Morro Bay again. I have to get there in time to harvest the corn! Regards and love, Pete

"Sanctuary!" (by Joan)

If this were a Disney movie, I'd be Quasimodo running through the aisles and passageways of Notre Dame Cathedral shouting "Sanctuary!" But, instead, I'm the scary looking, sock-footed hunchback roaming the dark hallways of the Residence Inn whispering, "I think I can, I think I can...." Somehow if feels perfectly normal to be in a loose-fitting, somewhat-revealing (in all the wrong places) hospital gown roaming the hospital hallways when everyone who passes you smiles and gives you an encouraging nod, but if feels entirely different to be wandering up and down the hotel hallways in sweats and socks looking like you're either drunk or deformed and the people who pass you just try not to make eye contact at all. But I'm not complaining! It's great to be out of the hospital.

Joy and my dad are taking great care of me. I'm slowing learning all the things that are currently impossible to do, like bending over to pick up the piece of trash I dropped on the floor or opening the heavy hotel room door or opening the pudding package because I can't pull the foil top off. One should never take their core muscles for granted! My surgery and recovery was often compared to a c-section and as I lay in my hospital bed I kept thinking, "Oh, thank God I don't have a newborn baby to care for right now!"

I think Joy kept everyone pretty well up-to-date while my mom and I were in the hospital. But here are a few insights from my perspective:

1. Being a patient at Stanford Hospital is like living in the middle of a "Grey's Anatomy" episode. It was particularly surreal while I was sitting in pre-op at 6 am Wednesday morning. I sat there waiting for about an hour as all the doctors, nurses, interns and residents filtered into the surgery area. They were chatting about the softball game after work, gossiping about the attending physicians and surgeons and comparing notes on what procedures they were going to get to work on that day. I saw one intern very obviously kissing up to one of the surgeons and trying to impress him with all his background. One lucky intern was behind the curtain across from me assisting with a femoral artery catheter - it was all the buzz among the other envious interns! The poor little old lady who was having the procedure done had no idea what a stir she was causing just outside the curtain. Like any good red-blooded single girl on the set of "Grey's Anatomy," I kept my eye out for McDreamy. On my last day there I finally found him - well, the closest thing to him (cute, nice, young - but not too young - and not wearing a wedding ring). Wouldn't you know it, he showed up exactly once: to remove the catheter from my incision that runs from just below my belly-button to just above the rapidly-growing-five-o'clock shadow where they had shaved me before surgery three days ago! Who says God doesn't have a sense of humor?!

2. If my current job doesn't work out, there's always a place for me in the circus freak show. Apparently I could either be billed as "Joan - the human pincushion!" or "The woman with freakishly small veins!" By the end of our first night in the hospital before the surgery, I already been poked at least ten times. It took a couple attempts to put in my IV line, four more to draw blood, and then another four times that ended up being a complete waste. I had agreed to be part of a study that my nephrologist and surgeon are working on. They want to study how the kidneys of healthy kidney donors compensate for the lost kidney over a period of years. I was very supportive of being part of the study because I know that we all benefit from those who have been part of clinical trials and research in the past. However, after I signed all the papers and gave all my consent, the research nurse couldn't get a second IV in my other arm to do the draws that they needed, so she finally gave up on me. I was being especially patient and trying not to complain, but I almost punched her when she said that I could definitely benefit from starting to lift weights because that would make my veins bigger. A swift right hook would have shown her just how much I've already been working out......but I am not a violent person :)

3. It's prayer that gets you through the darkest moments. I tried not to be naive about what this procedure entailed and what I would feel like after surgery, but I definitely hit a wall at one point. It was Friday morning (two days after surgery). I had been trying to do everything they asked me to do and had managed to sit in a chair and walk to my hospital room door on Thursday, but not without excruciating pain. They told me, "The first time is the hardest. It gets easier after that." To this, I have one thing to say "Liar!" The first FOUR times are miserable, and then it gets slightly bearable after that. My breakdown included lots of tears (try crying after abdominal surgery - not fun!), a nurse whom I inwardly cursed (but later outwardly thanked and praised), a poor lab tech-in-training who stared at my arm like she had never seen a vein before, and some nameless resident who casually dropped by to give me the box with the instructions for the unexpected shot I was going to have to give myself every day at home for the next week. At some point it just became too much to handle and I just lost it. I couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel. They told me I wouldn't feel better until I started walking, but I couldn't get past the pain to even stand upright. It was two days after the surgery and nothing felt like it was getting better. That's the point where you just give it up to God. I'm sure it's only the prayers that got me through it - both the prayers I offered up and the many from all of you who have been praying and thinking healing thoughts for us. I can't say "thank you" enough to all of you.

4. When you think you've got it bad, you don't have to look very far to see that someone else has it worse. In my case, I only had to look to my right about six feet. The first couple days in my room after surgery, I could only see my hospital roommate when she got up to walk to the bathroom. All I knew about her was that she was strong enough to get out of bed frequently to pee and she got "real" food at mealtime (I could smell it.) I was envious on both accounts. But as we talked more through the curtain, I learned that Taylor was awaiting her 17th abdominal surgery on Friday, but before that she will have surgery on her leg on Wednesday to insert a filter which will hopefully catch the blood clot that has formed in her leg after her last surgery. Her longest stretch in a hospital at one time was a month. She's lost 100 pounds during the whole ordeal. It wasn't too long before I too was making frequent trips to the bathroom and getting the "real" food tray at mealtime, and then I was packing up my bag to leave. It was then that I realized my ordeal had been so small in comparison to what others go through. My dad and Joy met a couple women in my mom's unit who had been coming to the hospital every day for four and nine months respectively. It sheds a real light on "in sickness and in health".

My mom continues to do a little better each day. Today she had all the other tubes removed except the catheter. The plan is still for her to be released tomorrow (Monday). We both know we are in good hands: our caretakers', Stanford's and ultimately in God's hands.

Many, many thanks for all your comments, prayers and love. Joy shared them with us in the hospital and they really were greatly appreciated.

Home = Marriott Residence Inn

We brought Joan "home" from the hospital yesterday! She is doing great and walking around quite a bit. I'm sure it felt good to be able to shower and put on some "real" clothes. I will be staying close to the hotel today with Joan, while my dad continues to visit my mom in the hospital.

We are hoping Addie will be released from the hospital tomorrow. She is also doing great and walking around. If all goes as planned, tomorrow they can remove all her IVs and tubes. She will still be on over a dozen medications, but at least she will be able to move around freely. I'm sure it will be a huge relief when that time comes since she also will no longer have her dialysis connector.

We are looking forward to having them both with us at the hotel. I have decided to stay one more day here, hoping that I can help bring my mom "home." Joan's friend Kata will be coming tomorrow to be with her for a few days. It is amazing that so much has happened in the past week!

They're up and at 'em

Both Addie and Joan were up and walking around today! Joan and Addie both made significant improvements between this morning and this afternoon. By the end of the day, Joan was walking around without any assistance. They offered to let her come home today, to which she responded, "Is this really what it feels like to be ready to go home?" We hope to bring Joan back from the hospital tomorrow.

My mom was also walking around independently (although she has to use her IV stand) by the end of the day. She even came out of her room to see Jade who was running around in the hallway. My cousin Tiana, her fiance Jon, and my friend Brie accompanied my dad and I to the hospital today. It was nice to have lots of extra helping hands with Jade. We were all really excited to see my mom and Joan up and walking! They are both doing really well!

Addie and Joan have both enjoyed hearing the comments posted on the blog, which I continued to share with them today.

A Short Update

We spent today alternating between Addie and Joan's rooms. Addie is doing very well, and is happy to report that her kidney is functioning even better than most newly transplanted kidneys at this time. She also wanted to be sure we mention in the blog how wonderful the nurses and staff are at Stanford. Each nurse in her wing attends to only two patients. Addie was able to get out of bed and sit in her chair today. She will most likely be discharged on Sunday or Monday.

Joan spent much of the day trying to move as little as possible. Fortunately, they switched her pain medication from the IV to a pill. Last night she woke up every fifteen minutes to push her pain medication button. Hopefully, now that she has the pill she will be getting relief for a longer period of time. She did get up and walk today, but they are planning to keep her until Saturday instead of releasing her tomorrow.

Thanks for all the wonderful comments on yesterday's post! I read them all to Joan and Addie, and they were very appreciative!

Visiting Hours

We finally got to see Joan and Addie when we returned to the hospital after dinner. Joan is coherent and was able to tell us about her experience. She is definitely not ready to get up any time soon, but she was alert and doing as well as could be expected. They hope to have her up and walking tomorrow (to which she responded that she can not even think about that now!) We stayed until visiting hours were over (8 p.m.) and then went to see Addie. We can visit Joan again after 11 a.m. tomorrow. Addie is in another wing of the hospital and has her own private room. She was still groggy, but looking really great! She has several machines monitoring her, but the nurse seemed very vigilant and said they are more flexible about visiting hours and we could come see her again in the morning. We are feeling very positive about everything and looking forward to visiting them again tomorrow!

Excited to share our good news!

Today was T-Day (transplant day)! It is 5:30 p.m. and we are still waiting to see Joan and Addie, but we heard their surgeries went well! Addie's kidney is already working and the surgeon said everything is looking really good!

My aunt Debbie came up last night and has been here supporting us and helping with Jade. It is so nice to have her here! We all arrived at the hospital this morning and were able to see my mom up until she was taken in for surgery. Joan was taken in early this morning and has been in recovery since noon. We have been waiting for her to be assigned a room so we can visit her, but apparently her room is still not ready. In the meantime, Addie was taken into surgery and is also now in recovery. We are assuming they are in the recovery room together, so hopefully they are together even though we cannot be with them.

We have been told that Addie will be taken into her room within the hour, so we are anxious to visit her. This is much earlier than we thought we would be able to see her, but we understand that they probably want to move her into isolation as soon as possible. There will be stricter visiting hours and rules for Addie for awhile, but hopefully we will all be able to visit her today (with the exception of Jade, who may have to wait a little longer to see grandma).

Thank you for all your prayers and messages today! We can feel your love and support! I hope to post another update later this evening, after we have seen Joan and Addie.

We arrived safely.

We arrived safely at the Marriott Residence Inn at Los Altos this afternoon. Our drive went by quickly with minimal stops. It was a balmy 94 degrees when we arrived, and we just finished enjoying a family meal together outside our rooms. My mom kept Jade entertained on the drive up, and now Jade is exhausted from all the excitement. Tomorrow morning, my dad and I will take Joan and my mom to check in at Stanford at 11 a.m. My mom is looking forward to her first night without her dialysis cycler since this time last year.

We're all packed!

It's been a whirlwind of a weekend, but I think I can safely say that we're all packed and ready to head to Stanford in the morning. My parents have packed all the comforts of home to sustain them during their two-month absence. Mom has all the ingredients for her Chinese comfort food and Dad has all the necessities to cook and bake his specialties. All of us have lots of reading material, listening material and comfortable clothes. True to Pedersen form, we are well-organized and loaded down with food! All duties have been assigned: visiting Grandma, running the office, watering the yard, pulling the weeds, feeding the cat, collecting the mail and paying the bills. It's an understatement to say this is a group effort! We certainly wouldn't be able to make room in our lives for this transplant without the help and support of so many friends and family. My word for this weekend has been "abundance." We've had phone calls, visits, dinners and just so much love from so many people. It almost takes your breath away! We are blessed beyond words.

Tomorrow morning we pile into three cars and caravan north. Joy and Jade will be with us for the first week and our Aunt Debbie will be there for the day of the surgeries. Several people have asked where we will be staying. For the next month, we will be at the Residence Inn Palo Alto/Los Altos (4460 El Camino Real, Los Altos, CA 94022).

I hope that Joy or my dad will be able to add a post on Wednesday night after our surgeries and let everyone know how things went. I'm sure the cell phones won't work in the hospital, but my mom always says that "No news is good news" so just keep a positive thought for us and assume the best!

If all goes as planned....

I've had many people asking what the recovery schedule is following my mom's and my surgeries. As the doctors are always quick to warn us, everyone's recovery is different. However, I can give you a general overview of what we're planning for at this time.

Our family will leave for Stanford next Monday, July 13th. My mom and I are checking into Stanford Hospital on Tuesday. The most important item on my agenda for that day is to be sure to tell the anesthesiologist that I want to be pumped full of the anti-nausea medication well-before I come out of surgery. I'm one of those people who's an easy puker and that's pretty much the last thing I want to be doing after abdominal surgery!

I'm scheduled to have my kidney removed in the morning of Wednesday, July 15th. If all goes well, the surgeon will take a lunch break around noon and then put my kidney (which will have been chilling on ice) into my mom that afternoon. Assuming everything looks good during the transplant, the surgeon will take out my mom's dialysis access tube (in her abdomen) at the same time. She will officially be off dialysis from then on!

They've told me that I should probably be released from the hospital on Friday or Saturday, and my mom will hopefully be released on Saturday or Sunday. I will have a follow-up appointment the next Thursday and then a couple check-ups over the next year, just to make sure I've healed properly. My mom, on the otherhand, will just be at the beginning of a crazy schedule of visits back to the Stanford Medical Center. During the first month, she will go for lab work and visits several times a week. They will be monitoring the new kidney and adjusting her medications (more than a dozen of them!) accordingly. They are very vigilant about looking for signs of rejection. During the second month following the transplant, the visits and lab work decrease slightly to just a couple times a week. She and my dad will remain in the Stanford/Palo Alto area for those two months. Hopefully, they will return to Morro Bay mid-September and just drive up to Stanford for the few appointments during the next month. She's been told to stay away from work and any other kinds of stressors for a full three months following the surgery.

My recovery is much more simple. Some pain meds and lots of rest for the first couple weeks. I'll stay up in Stanford/Palo Alto with my parents for a couple weeks before heading back home. I can't do any heavy lifting for about 6 weeks (which apparently rules out both my cat and my niece!) I hope to be back at work around the second week of August (if I can keep my self away from the office at the first of the month!)

My dad has the very important job of being my mom's primary caretaker. It's a great responsibility, but I know he's up to the task and we'll try to give him as much support as possible. There's lots of medication to manage, monitoring to do and screening out of the potential stressors that come along. I'm sure that along with any worry about the responsibility, he's also looking forward to a lot of time together for the two of them away from the demands of home life.

So, that's what we're planning for right now. Only time will tell if things go along as planned. As always we just take one day at a time.....

The apple of Grandma's eye

I just wanted to share this picture from our informal "Family Day" yesterday. We spent a relaxing (and gorgeous!) day at the house: eating (Pete made Danish pancakes, cinnamon rolls & pizza from scratch), playing, enjoying the garden that Pete has so lovingly maintained, and just overall being thankful for time together before the craziness sets in. I think this is my favorite picture from the whole day. It captures the sheer sense of joy that Jade has brought into our family's life, but particularly to Addie, who is relishing all the joys of "grandmahood." The beginning of Addie's dialysis was coincidentally timed almost perfectly with Jade's arrival last summer. It was as if God said, I know you're starting something that will be challenging and burdensome, but here's a little something to help you enjoy yourself and bring you new life as you journey through it.

(Joan)

Countdown to a transplant

Greetings to friends and family, and welcome to our blog. We figured this would be the best way to keep everyone up-to-date on Addie's kidney transplant. We are less than three weeks away from T-Day (Transplant Day) - July 15. Last week Addie received her first IVIG (intravenous immune globulin) treatment. It went better than she expected and hopefully this is a sign of good things to come.

For those of you not familiar with the background of the upcoming transplant, here is a VERY brief summary of our adventure thus far:

Although Addie had been aware for several years that her kidney function was less than desirable, it wasn't until a local acupuncturist, Dr. Yu, recommended she go see the specialists up in Stanford that Addie realized how severe the situation was. She was put on the list for a cadaver kidney donor in the summer of 2006. The expected wait time was approximately seven years. At that time, the doctor told her that based on her current kidney function, he expected she would need to go on dialysis by the end of that year. Those of you who know Addie know that she is very determined and very disciplined. After some initial research, she made severe restrictions to her diet and was able to remain off dialysis for another two years. She started at-home peritoneal dialysis last summer.

Joy and Joan were initially tested as potential donors back in 2006, but were not found to be within the realm of a good match back then. Since then we explored the possibility of a couple other family members, but for various reasons, those did not work out. Last spring (2008), Stanford informed us that new advances in technology and medicine were making it possible for them to widen the realm of matching donors and Joan now fit within the margins of a "match". After much testing and some delays, we finally received the green light and the date has been set for July 15.

We hope to use this blog to keep you updated as the family travels up to Stanford for the surgery and Addie and Pete remain up there for the couple months following the surgery for follow-up care. Over the next couple weeks before the transplant, we'll post some of our thoughts and plans leading up to T-Day. Please check back here for updates or subscribe to the feed to get notification when the blog is updated.

Many thanks to all those whose prayers, thoughts and kind words have kept our spirits up and blessings flowing over the past three years!!

(Joan)